Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 7: Episodes 11-16

This is a 22 episode season, so I’m splitting the last two entries on it into six episodes each. To keep myself on the track of finishing this season without a seven episode post.

Season 7

Episode 11: “You Know I love You…Don’t You?”

Oh, the drama. So, Nathan gets an offer to play on a team in Spain, while Haley has to decide if she wants to go out on tour. Torn, she breaks her, “not talking to Quinn” rule, so that she has someone to talk it out with. Quinn tells her that she’s always loved that Haley was a caretaker but that she needs to take care of herself. Which is why in the end, Nathan and Haley agree that she and Jamie will go on tour and Nathan will go to Spain and everything will be fine, because Haley deserves to have her dreams too. AWWW.

Speaking of dreams, Brooke and Julian are dealing with the fallout that she can’t have children. Julian says he’s fine to Brooke but then tells Alex that he really wants kids. Alex then brings Brooke a bunch of fertility brochures and Brooke freaks because, you know, Julian confided in Alex instead of her. So then she confronts Julian, Julian confronts Alex, Alex slits her wrists in a bathtub. You know, the usual thing.

Meanwhile, Millie still continues to be the worst. When Mouth and Alex try to talk to her, she’s just bitchy to them, and when Victoria bails her out of jail. She just goes to McKenna to get more coke. It’s all awful and I hate everything about it.

Dan gives Rachel a bunch of money to leave, because Jimmy’s mom comes to yell at him about exploiting his crime and her son’s death. Dan seems to have grown a conscience and it’s very strange. Rachel is not happy about it.

Clay goes to Arkansas to sign a quarterback, who is meant to be his Cuba Gooding Jr. in Jerry Maguire, but then realizes that he can’t give the kid what he needs and decides to leave Tree Hill. He does this leaving a very pretty, crying Quinn in his living room. Skills gets that job in LA, by submitting a video of a recreation of White Men Can’t Jump with Jamie and Chuck. Jamie and Skills have a very sweet talk about grown ups needing to leave the town where they grew up. (I too have been thinking about this a lot…)

OH RIGHT AND ALEX SLIT HER WRISTS!!!!! DON’T DIE ALEX! THE SHOW NEEDS YOUR SASSY ATTITUDE AND DRAMA ADDICTION!

Episode 12: “Some Roads Lead Nowhere”

Alex’s suicide attempt leads Julian, Brooke and Millie to all reevaluate their situation. Julian fights to get their movie financed, explaining to Brooke that he sees a lot of his mother in Alex and he wants to save her. Brooke sort of gets this but is still pretty annoyed by it. Millie enters rehab and she and Mouth break up. But then she immediately runs away from rehab. SIGH.

Dan decides to end his show and give all of his money to charity because you shouldn’t profit off the cold blooded murder of your brother. Then he gives Rachel divorce papers and goes to see Jamie who says that he forgives him. It’s pretty sweet.

Skills is moving to LA and he and Lauren break up. It’s fairly low drama but still pretty sad. Also, Quinn helps Clay with some Shenanigans that lead to him getting Nathan a deal with The Kings, so that he can at least stay in the US. Then he tells her that he’s falling in love with her and they go swimming in the ocean.

Meanwhile, Nathan, Haley and Jamie get ready to say good bye to Tree Hill, by being whacky all over Tric. Also, it turns out that the magical bar tender is actually an amazing musician, and Miranda signs him.

Episode 13: “Weeks Go By Like Days”

It’s been six weeks and everyone seems pretty happy. Except Brooke, Julian and Millie. They’re pretty miserable, so let’s dive into that first. Brooke is working on her men’s line along side the vaguely Hemsworth-ish Alexander. By this I mean he is good looking, blonde and Australian. He is, however, not even close to Liam, the least of the Hemsworths in terms of charm and perfection. Anyway, she and Julian haven’t spoken in six weeks and when Julian sees her and Alexander together he totally misinterprets it and they get into a fight. Then Julian tries to explain that he can’t be with Brooke if she won’t open up to her and they break up and it’s awful.

Meanwhile, Millie goes to court and it’s the worst. Victoria then offers her another job. She also then goes to McKenna’s party, and then Alex pulls her out of it and tells her that she’s not going to let her go down the road she went down. It’s pretty sweet and Alex really is my favorite late era OTH character.

Quinn and Clay have their first official date, eating whatever junk he has in his fridge and going to see Haley’s big show, the finale of her tour back in Tree Hill. Jamie is bragging about the tour and it’s annoying his friends, so Nathan gives him a little talking to about not being a dick when you get to do cool shit. It’s a very nice dad moment. Everyone’s all happy and junk but then Taylor turns up in town with Quinn’s ex husband David!

JAMES SISTER DRAMA!

Episode 14: “Family Affair”

One Tree Hill really is at it’s best when it’s dealing with drama between family members, and that’s one of the reasons why this is the best episode in a while. Haley is in full form freak out over Taylor and David’s coupledom, and Quinn is trying to pretend that she’s totally OK with it. Taylor is not helping the situation, by being herself. They all (James sisters and their respective men) and Haley isn’t even trying to hide her anger. They wind up having a huge pool hurtling physical fight and everyone agrees that Taylor is the worst, but also that David and Taylor are free to do whatever they want.

Mouth and Lauren clean up the Mouth/Skills/Millie/Lauren apartment (didn’t Fergie and Junk used to live their too? I mean what happened to Fergie and Junk? Did Millie kill them while in a cocaine fueled rage? I need that fic…) which was trashed, I assume when Millie threw a party. They do a cute little CSI bit about it too, and talk about how much it sucks to be alone.

Brooke and Julian sort of negotiate a peace and he’s decided that he’s going to direct the movie, mostly because Brooke encourages him to, which is adorable, and because who they originally had, a douche who kept hitting on and triggering Alex.

Oh, also, Brooke and Millie make up and I really hope she’s through her the worst phase.

Episode 15: “Don’t You Forget About Me”

This episode manages to pull off what “We Three (My Echo, My Shadow And Me,” could not. By exploring a couple of thematic connection and direct homages to John Hughes, we get to play with these characters in some great ways. Plus we see some kick ass 80’s fashion, and Cheap Trick is there.

The action hinges on an 80’s themed fundraiser that Haley and Quinn are throwing for the high school. Haley gets the 16 Candles plot, with it being her birthday and everyone forgetting it. Until the end, when Nathan shows up with a red corvette and then they get home and Jamie made her a birthday cake and they reenact that kiss.

Nathan and Clay get Planes, Trains And Automobiles, as they try to get to the dance after Clay’s car breaks down. It’s very cute.

Mouth, Fergie and Junk (HEY! They didn’t get murdered) riff on Weird Science, summoning Kylie as an internet date for Mouth to get him out of his breaking up with Millie haze. Then Mouth and Fergie get a Home Alone riff with Jamie. Which is adorable.

Meanwhile the saga of Brooke, Julian, Alex and Alexander continues. Alexander and Brooke go to the dance together, and Alex drags Julian. Brooke and Julian wind up chatting and decide to try to be friends. Also, Haley and Brooke reminisce about high school.

Here’s a thing that’s annoying about this episode though. Julian, Alex, Alexander and Clay are all at this party, but Junk and Fergie, who you know actually attended Tree Hill High, are on Jamie duty? Like, ask Julian to babysit, he loves Jamie.

Overall though the episode is very sweet, and Julian’s monologue about what made Hughe’s movies special really is quite sweet. And Cheap Trick is in his episode. CHEAP TRICK!

Episode 16: “My Attendance Is Bad But My Intentions Are Good”

Hey more James Family Drama! I mean, I guess after 6 seasons of the Scotts, it’s worth it, but also, like, who cares? Anyway, Haley’s mom shows up and we learn that her father died a few years back. (RIP Huey Lewis, who is not actually dead…but on the show, oh, you follow), and now she’s checking in with her girls (yes, Taylor is still around. Yes, she and David also already broke up) and as it turns out that she has terminal cancer and she isn’t seeking treatment. All three girls react differently, but Taylor packs angrily, gets into a fight with Haley and leaves. Quinn and Haley wind up coming around to it and decide to enjoy this time with their mother.

Alex is determined to get Julian and Brooke back together and has decided to set her sights on Alexander. Also Millie goes to an NA meeting after very nearly using again after some girls see her working in the C over B store and recognize her from the “Zero Is Not A Size” campaign and she freaks out.

Most of the run time is dedicated to the James girls, which is a nice change, but also, as I said earlier in the season, I just don’t care much. I never liked Taylor, and while I’ve come around on Quinn, I still think they’re taking emotional short cuts when it comes to her and it offends me that a show that once had a storyline as long, slow, satisfying and emotionally mixed and Peyton and Jake would ever take an emotional short cut.

Also, like Lucas and Peyton wouldn’t run home learning that Haley’s mom was dying! It just strains credibility at this point.

Oh, right and Miranda and The Magical Bartender who’s name I can’t remember are totally in love and it’s sort of adorable. Miranda is probably my second favorite new character after Alex, so I’m into it.

Overall Analysis of This Arc

Look, I’m in this for the long haul. I’m going to finish. But it’s getting hard. Like X-Files season 9 hard. The storylines are meandering and disconnected. The characters are boring. The big set pieces are starting to outweigh the emotions. Brooke and Julian are still great, but beyond that, I’m just not really getting anything from the show right now. But I’m giving it the chance to come back around. I mean, X-Files sort of did right? (But then it got awful again.)

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 7: Episodes 6-10

Season 7

Episode 6: “Deep Ocean, Vast Sea”

Brooke is so very done with Alex. She fires her and lays down the word with Julian that she’d rather not deal with Alex’s shenanigans in their relationship. This is, of course, after an immature outburst that leads to her measuring a semi nude Chase, because she’s decided to extend Clothes Over Bros to Clothes For Bros as well.

The half naked Chase scene just leads to Chase and Mia being adorable. Because they are. I almost don’t want to move forward, because I’m so afraid that they’re going to break up. They’re just an oasis of adorable. They’re not even in most episodes, they’re just the best.

Haley is really starting to  believe Renee, who is now working with Dan and Rachel to talk about her story. Nathan is feeling a little put out, because he’s losing his endorsements, and Clay is sort of checked out, and Haley doesn’t believe that he didn’t get another woman pregnant. His point that him abandoning a child he fathered makes him like Dan, and that’s what stings the most about all of this, that Haley believes he’s anything like his father.

Millie starts taking diet pills, because she thinks she’s too fat to be a model or something. Also Mouth does another “sports news should be pure and not report on my buddy’s supposed love child” broadcast. I don’t think Mouth understands how the media works, like at all. Also, Nathan and Quinn fight about her and Clay hanging out and Clay leaves Tric with a  mysterious blonde, and I still don’t care. (OK, I’m starting to care a little) (Also, I know that the mysterious blond is Clay’s wife Sarah, who’s dead, and this is her ghost.)

Episode 7: “I And Love And You”

So. Many. Flashbacks.

I think I’ve put my finger on what annoys me about the Quinn and Clay storyline. Actually, I’ve known it forever and it was what turned me off of the show. For all of it’s bonkers plotting and on the nose dialog, One Tree Hill never, before this season, used to use shortcuts on the characters. The characters earned your love. Here, they’re trying to tell us that we love Quinn and Clay without earning that love.

This episode does a lot to alieviate that. Showing Quinn’s disillusionment with her marriage to David, as well as Clay’s happier than actually possible marriage to Sarah, through flashbacks, and Clay’s conversation with Sarah’s ghost. So, I’m backing off on the “Quinn and Clay Ruined the Show” stuff for the moment. They may yet prove me wrong. I’m just saying the flashbacks worked.

Brooke and Julian have a very nice, very honest conversation about their future. It’s sweet and disconnected from just about everything else that’s going on right now with the show. But it’s very nice and I like it a lot.

Meanwhile, in, what’s everyone else doing? Dan has Renee on his show, and hooks her up to a lie detector to prove that Nathan is a cheating scum bag. But then, PLOT TWIST! Dan actually uses the lie detector to prove Nathan didn’t father Renee’s baby, and now that lying whore can go away forever! (This statement is satirical. But I’m pretty sure Renee does go away forever…) Also, it turns out that Dan had a heart transplant! WHAT? MORE DAN CENTRIC PLOT TWISTS! Also, Haley and Nathan talk about how their love will see them through whatever happens. It’s adorable. And unnecessary, as it turns out that nothing happened.

Also, better story telling would have been having Clay be the baby daddy. I’m just saying.

Episode 8: “(I Just) Died In Your Arms Tonight”

It’s this season’s hang out episode! And it’s a doozy! So, the guys (except Clay) go off on a camping trip. Julian doesn’t want to go, having not yet bonded with the other dudes, and pointing out to Brooke that he’s never really been friends with dudes. Brooke tells him that this is all silly and that he should go. So he does. He’s such an awkward dork, and it’s so cute. His movie nerddom does not fit in with Nathan and Skills’s jock vibe, which is complimented by Mouth’s sports nerddom. But he endears himself to the group by saving Jamie’s dignity a few times, and scaring the pants off of Chuck. Also, he and Nathan talk about having shitty fathers.

Speaking of Nathan’s shitty father, we get yet another flashback to Dan’s super sketchy and illegal Mexican heart transplant, that I’m pretty sure is really racist. Anyway, Dan’s feeling guilty and seeing the ghost of the young Mexican boy who’s family Rachel bought his new heart from. Anyway, after they fight kind of, Dan decides that they should go home to Tree Hill.

Quinn makes some pot brownies, and then doesn’t eat them so she gets to see the hilarity that is Haley and Brooke high. (Brooke high, BTW is me high. I get very paranoid, and then angry and forgetful. I hate weed.) She also calls a psychic, who tells her to go to Clay, who’s spending the weekend with his wife’s ghost, who is kind of really into him boning Quinn. They wind up spending the night on the beach, talking about his dead wife.

That is the least sexy thing to ever happen on this show.

Oh, right, and Julian learns about the Nathan and Brooke sex tape. Guys, I miss that era of the show so much…

Episode 9: “Now Lift Your Eyes To The Sun”

Rachel and Dan are back in town, and of course a bunch of stuff hits the fan along with that. Jamie is ready to forgive Dan, and Nathan is starting to waffle. Haley isn’t involved in this because she’s having a surprise show to try out some of her new material at Tric. Miranda isn’t thrilled about it, but also, like, I feel like that’s a fairly normal thing to do? I don’t know, I don’t understand the resistance there. But the show goes well.

Rachel goes to see Mouth who, in the way only he can, tells her that she needs to make things right with Brooke. She attempts to, kind of, by paying Brooke back for the money she stole, but she also, doesn’t really apologize, and Brooke doesn’t take that well. But as usual, Rachel gets all the good lines. When she says hi to Jamie and tells him, “I remember when you were a rumor in third period,” I nearly died laughing.

Millie’s been taking diet pills, and is quickly going down the Jessie Spano manic drain. She’s mean to Mouth and Brooke, and is acting more and more like Alex. It’s not attractive. In the end, she steals some coke from Alex, and that’s going to be a thing now.

Alex, afraid that she’s going to use again, calls Julian to talk her out of it. But when the vial she’s staring at turns out to be empty he storms out, really angry, because this friendship is straining his relationship with Brooke and now it turns out Alex is a liar.

She’s not a liar, but that’s sure to come out eventually.

Quinn and Clay continued to live out their Nicholas Sparks movie, by finally sleeping together, I think? There have been like four or five fake outs with them. But they also volunteer at a youth center together, and Clay befriends a kid playing basketball.

Episode 10: “You Are A Runner and I Am My Father’s Son”

Oh boy, are things ever about to get nuts. Clay has stopped communing with his wife’s ghost and is full on with this whole Quinn thing, to the point where he messes up Nathan’s contract. Because of this, Nathan, kind of rightfully, fires him as his agent. Look, I’m not saying that Nathan using Clay’s relationship with Quinn as part of his justification for it is fair, but Nathan wanted to stay on The Bobcats, and Clay didn’t get that done, so you know, fired.

Speaking of people who are behaving weirdly. Millie’s doing loads of coke and just generally acting like a garbage person. (A garbage person is a person who’s made of garbage, the worst kind of person. A garbage person is not be confused with a sanitation worker, who is usually a hard working individual who keeps our streets clean) She’s demanding Brooke pay her lots of money for the modeling…which, I mean, again not unreasonable, but the way she’s going about it is just not cool, and is clearly not going to jibe with Brooke. She’s getting drunk with Alex, who’s supposed to be sober, and also stealing from her, even when Alex tries to explain why she can’t be around people who do coke. She’s lying to Mouth and taking him for granted. Katherine once warned me that they totally ruined Millie. I see this now.

Rachel has the brilliant idea to film Dan’s show from the hallways where he killed Keith. Dan thinks this is a weird idea. Dan’s instinct here is right on. Dan then just wanders around town dispensing unsolicited advice to different people, namely Mouth and Clay. With Mouth, he says that he was right to stand up for Nathan (ehh) and with Clay, he “baptizes” him in the ocean, (nearly drowns him), telling him to get his shit together and get Nathan a job. (What?)

Skills takes a job with a sports coordinating company in LA, which means he has to move out there. Brooke, in addition to being shit on by Millie for a few scenes, and interacting with a very drunk (and hilarious) Victoria, confesses that she recently learned she can’t have children. Julian, being perfect, hugs her and tells her that he’ll do whatever it takes for them to have a family.

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

In general? I like what’s going on here, but, like most of latter day OTH, it all feels quite disconnected. There’s no real reason for Brooke’s storyline to connect with Nathan’s which barely connects with Quinn and Clay’s, and that’s a real failing for a show that was once so thematically sound on an arc to arc and episode to episode basis. While I get that’s necessary as the cast grows and the storylines escalate, it’s just really disheartening.

Alex remains the best. She’s like Rachel but better. And Rachel’s around, and is probably the most consistently written character in the show’s history, so that’s cool.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 7: Episodes 1-5

Guys, we’re just about diving into the unknown. I think that these five episodes were the last episodes I watched on the regular. Seriously. I’m interested into seeing what happens.

Season 7

Episode 1: “4:30 AM (Apparently They Were Travelling Abroad)”

It’s time for us to check in on everyone status quo. I remember seeing this episode and being completely confused. Nothing terrible had happened? No one was waiting for some awful news? Dan alive, Nathan thriving in the NBA, and filming a commericial. Mouth and Millie together, Brooke and Julian together, Haley recording, and Nathan’s agent Clay, who we’re supposed to care about all of a sudden is hanging around, and Haley’s sister Quinn also shows up.

It’s Jamie’s birthday, and there’s a party. We learn that Nathan is having trouble getting a new contract to the levels he wants. Julian turned down a huge movie in New Zealand to be with Brooke. Oh, and Quinn left her husband and Clay has random sex with the model from Nathan’s commercial. And a girl is trying to blackmail Nathan by saying they slept together at some party.  Oh also, we meet Miranda, who wants to close Red Bedroom Records, Haley has that to deal with.

Episode 2: “What Are You Willing To Lose?”

So Haley is fighting to keep the label open with Miranda, and it’s actually a really good conflict for her. She also gets to role play a conversation with Peyton and Lucas where she does imitations of them, it’s hilarious and great. She eventually convinces Miranda that she’s worth keeping on because of that old Tree Hill stand by, “I really love this and it matters to me,” and thus a new thing is born for Haley to do.

Nathan and Clay confront the black mailer. She says that she has proof that Nathan slept with her. Seriously, I had next to no memory of this plot line. It’s pretty contrived, and now that I’m revisiting it I remember it a little, and being sort of let down that they didn’t have Nathan actually cheat. You have to remember that by the time this season aired, Gossip Girl had been on the air for three years, and in Gossip Girl, Nathan would have totally actually cheated. but OTH has different rules, which make for slightly healthier relationship models, but way less drama.

BUT, for every, Nathan is actually faithful to Haley lack of drama there is a Dan shaped piece of bonkers joy, this season, that is held by the fact that he’s now working as a Dr. Phil type personality and is married to Rachel. RACHEL!

Oh, also, Quinn and Clay flirt, and Quinn explains to Haley why she left her husband, and I’m sorry, I just don’t care. Maybe I’ll eventually care, but not at the moment.

We also meet Alex, the trainwreck actress, who I sort of remember. Brooke hires her to be the face of clothes over bros, and she’s a trainwreck, and that’s what we need at the moment. Our main cast has their shit way too together these days.

Episode 3: “Hold My Hand as I’m Lowered”

We learn more about how Dan and Rachel ended up together. She was stripping and he hired her to have sex with him a few times. She laid some of her patented Rachel Gatina Truth Bombs on him, and she helped him write a self help book and now they’re together. Also, he’s taken to befriending the homeless, while she takes pictures of it. Also, he seems to actually love her? Which is just, so weird. She seems to just be in it for the money, which is just, so Rachel.

Brooke and Millie are dealing with Alex, who is very good on camera, and has also decided to set her sights on Julian, which is just, so hilarious, and great, and I kind of love her.

Mouth and Skills finally talk about why Skills doesn’t want to move out, and it’s because he isn’t ready to commit to Lauren. Mouth accepts this because Mouth is a really good dude. There’s also some bussiness with a lizard and a snake, and Jamie gets involved, because that kid needs a hobby. Or at least some age appropriate friends.

Clay and Quinn continue to flirt, but he hooks up with Alex, maybe? It’s been established that he’s a huge whore, and she’s still married, so those are both things. Also, her husband shows up. I have bumped up this plotline from “who cares” to “mildly diverting.”

Oh right, and blackmail girl is pregnant and Nathan decides to call her bluff, even though her going public will put his family through hell, even though he didn’t do anything, and this is all very confusing and weird. And Julian’s dad wants him to break up with Brooke, or marry her, and Brooke gets upset when Julian doesn’t ask her to marry him. Or something.

Episode 4: “Believe me, I’m Lying”

It’s time for a Clothes Over Bros fashion show. Millie organized it. It’s very fancy and some dumby model calls Millie ugly, so Alex gives her some pills to OD, and Brooke gave Millie the spot, while she sports the tee shirt that says “Zero Is Not A Size,” which is pretty great. She’s a big hit, and Alex takes her to a party, and she blows off Mouth.

Mouth is having a bad day because he doesn’t want to report on the whole, Nathan getting a girl pregnant thing. Which comes to a head this episode with it being reported in the tabloids, and Jamie finding it, and then Renee (blackmailing girl) confronting Haley at Tric, and Haley slapping her in the face. Also, Miranda bitches out a reporter who’s trying to get Haley’s take on things.

Chase is back, making terrible cocktails that get everyone drunk. And by everyone I mean, Clay and Quinn. Quinn finally tells her boring husband that she doesn’t want to be married anymore. So he comes to yell at her and Clay punches him. Then Quinn and Clay leave together.

We learn that the script that Alex gave Julian is a script that she wrote. Julian offers to help her with it, and Brooke is a little bit worried about that, because Alex, is Alex.

Episode 5: “Your Cheatin Heart”

So Haley’s in jail because Renee decide to press charges. She makes friends with a hooker and a woman who hit her cheating husband over the head with a computer, or something. Anyway, they, plus a conversation with Renee, plant the seeds of doubt about Nathan, though she is publicly standing by him. He gets real angsty about her having doubts though.

He takes that out on Clay, who he yells at about hooking up with Quinn, except they didn’t have sex, they just talked, which is not what Quinn told her boring husband and…OMG I’m starting to remember why I stopped watching the show, because they tried so hard to make Quinn and Clay a thing. And I just can’t bring myself to care.

Alex, however, is kind of my new favorite OTH character, besides Brooke, obviously. She’s great. She tries to seduce Julian and he rebuffs her adorably. Then Brooke yells at her and she accepts defeat adorably. Then she adorably tells Millie that Millie should totally be a model, again adorably.

Oh also, Chase is flying planes and Mia is visiting. Also, Dan is making some kind of plan with Renee, and reaching out to Nathan to try to help. Rachel tells him this isn’t a good plan. Of course it isn’t, because Rachel is smart, if misguided.

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

This is not as bad as I thought it would be. I truly don’t remember how any of this turns out, because, as I noted before this is about where I bailed (picking up to watch the last season, which I also wound up bailing on. I will not bail this time. I may stumble. (It took a bit of a push to get these episodes in…) but I’m going to finish. I think. Also, I like Alex. She’s like, the new Rachel. AND Rachel’s around. This is kind of the best.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill: Season 6: Episode 16-20

One_Tree_Hill_Season_6

Episode 16: “Screenwriters Blues”

Lucas, Adam and Julian are casting the movie and a few other small things happen. Adam and Lucas can’t agree on a Peyton, as Lucas can’t make decisions without a Haley pep talk, and Adam just wants the hottest one who will sleep with him. The rest of the gang is tripped out by seeing their dopplgangers.

Particularly Brooke, who’s actress takes to following her around and to learn about her. She’s very focused on the sex aspects, which makes Brooke very angry, particularly because she thinks this is how Lucas and Julian think of her. Julian explains that the Brooke character has an arc, and he’s not actually interested in Brooke as she was at 16.

Haley is beginning a conflict with her new principal, she wants to publish an essay Sam wrote in the school paper, and the principal says it’s inappropriate. She publishes it anyway, because she wants Sam to know that she matters.

Peyton is having trouble doing baby stuff on her own because Lucas is busy with the movie. Nathan feels guilty for taking another guys roster spot, and Jamie has a crush on his teacher, and Dan, not realizing it’s his teacher encourages to pursue it, which then leads to an adorable interaction between all three of them. In the end everyone makes up and is together, and the movie moves forward. (Oh also they cast Lucas’s choice for Peyton, because obviously.)

Episode 17: “You And Me And The Bottle Makes 3”

First of all, great song, second of all, OK episode. Peyton collapses because you know, it’s Lucas and Peyton, the can’t be happy for longer than 5 episodes in a row without something awful happening. Turns out that there’s some vague problem with the pregnancy, and the doctor is recommending they terminate it. Peyton doesn’t want to, Lucas’s the worst-ness comes out and he tries to guilt her into it because he doesn’t want to lose her. They decide to keep the baby.

Haley and Nathan celebrate their anniversary in an old house in Charleston, that Haley is thinking about buying. They discuss moving, changing their lives, and Haley possibly touring again. It’s pretty great.

Deb is babysitting Jamie and he invites Dan over for dinner. They all actually have a lovely evening, until Jamie goes to bed and Deb and Dan talk about, you know, that whole “he murdered Keith” thing. He points out that he only did it to get revenge for Deb sleeping with Keith and then thinking Keith set him on fire when Deb set him on fire. (God, that seems like so long ago…) Anyway, then Dan’s pager turns off and he

Mouth and Millie try to get back together, but don’t quite get there. Brooke and Julian talk about how Brooke closes off her heart when he says that he loves her. He winds up backing off, when he realizes that the last time she was in love was Lucas and he is not interested in getting back on that ride.

This is why I love Julian, he cuts right through the crap of the Tree Hill people.

Episode 18: “Searching For A Former Clarity”

It’s the greatest moment in the history of television. You know the one. When Dan is supposed to get his new heart, but then the EMT drops it and a dog eats it. It’s just so great, and then Lucas looks at him, like “see, see what Karama does?” Anyway, then Dan does his goodbye tour, you know, after throwing himself in the ocean and screaming at God for a while.

I love this show.

Lucas, Julian and Adam learn that Julian’s dad has been fired and Ravens has been put into turnaround. Adam celebrates, because he gets paid either way, Lucas and Julian are devastated. In the final scene of the episode, Adam lays down some Capeside wisdom for the two kids, it’s not about making the movie, it’s the beauty of the attempt, also he points out that he shot one scene, a sunset. This Dawson-esque moment allows for Julian and Lucas to at least get their production bonuses.

But because there’s no movie, Julian needs to go back to LA. This is a wrench in the works for him and Brooke even more than the unreciprocated, “I love you.” She freaks out and winds up taking it out on Sam, who gets caught shoplifting again, this time because she’s covering for Jack, who Brooke eventually takes in as well, because Brooke is a big softy.

Haley is facing repercussions for publishing Sam’s essay in the school paper, and is offered the chance to get her job back if she publicly apologizes. She’s about to and then changes her mind and walks out. She decides to become Mia’s full time producer. Oh also, Skills and Deb break up, because she realizes that once again he wants things that twenty three year olds want in the future, like children.

Episode 19: “Letting Go”

So much crying. Julian asks Brooke to come with him to LA, and to bring Sam, so that they can all be a family. She thinks it over and even has a heart to heart with Sam about it. But in the end she decides that she needs to stay in Tree Hill, because Sam needs the stability and she’s not quite ready to open up to him.

Sam and Jack stage a walk out when the new principal is basically abusive and awful, and all the kids show up at Haley and Nathan’s and they have a class on Catch-22 even when they don’t have to. In the end, Haley sends them back to school and turn the principal down when she offers her her job back.

Peyton is making an “in case I die” box for the baby, which is just the most Peyton thing ever. Lucas and Nathan take Jamie to Keith’s garage and teach him about cars and guy talk. Also Mouth and Millie get back together after Skills takes him to see Gigi and he realized how much he needs her.

Episode 20: “I Would For You”

I watched this episode twice and I barely remember what happens in it. Seriously, it’s not that memorable. I know Victoria’s back and wants Brooke to come back to Clothes Over Bros because without her the brand is tanking. Peyton gets into a car accident and has to be on bedrest for the rest of her pregnancy, and Lucas’s protective douche mode is activated. Jack gets placed with a new foster family in Charlotte and he and Sam are adorable. (They’re also adorable in the various ways they frustrate Victoria.)

Haley and Mia come visit Peyton, I think? Seriously, I don’t know why, I just can’t retain this one, you guys, I’m sorry.

Oh, and Mouth and Millie go to see In The Heights, because, like me, One Tree Hill was on the Lin-Manuel Miranda train early. Why don’t you tell me everything you know?

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

God I love the movie arc. Aside from introducing us to Julian, who really is truly great, it gave us a glimpse of James Vanderbeek’s comic genius that would, a few years later, be fully unleashed on Don’t Trust The B in Apartment 23. (Sadly cancelled too soon, but without its cancellation, we probably wouldn’t have gotten Kristen Ritter as Jessica Jones…so…) I also love just everything about Sam and this is her prime episodes. Also, I always wished the show had actually killed Dan, I mean I get why they didn’t, because there would have been an even larger gap to fill in with Chad Michael Murray and Hilarie Burton’s imminent departure if you also lost your main antagonist, but God, the preparing for death stuff is so good, and to not get the logical end to that story (you know, death) is such a buzz kill.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill: Season 6: Episodes 11-15

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Episode 11: “We Three (My Echo, My Shadow, and Me!)

It’s the 30’s movie episode! Objectively, this is just a terrible episode. It’s written and directed by Chad Michael Murray, for one thing, which, I mean, everything about it is fine, but at least allows for it’s tonal weirdness. The conceit is that Lucas falls asleep while watching Casablanca and dreams of an alternate universe, where the gang are all 30’s movie types. Lucas runs Karen’s Café as a suave Bogart type. Brooke is a down on her luck designer (still), Haley is the club’s singer, Skills the piano player, Nathan is a bar tender, Mouth is a gossip columnist, and Dan is the crime boss, Peyton is a girl he takes care of, and Julian his enforcer. Also Owen is a dirty cop (this is the analog that makes the least amount of sense).

Peyton and Lucas play out their star crossed romance, complicated by Dan just being the worst and Brooke selling them out. Also Nathan and Haley get married super fast right before he ships out to war. The whole exercise only works at all because the cast appears to be having a ball, and because it gave us a preview of Agent Jack Thompson, CMM in vintage suits, with his hair slicked back, running around irresponsibly pointing his gun at things. (RIP Agent Thompson, also #SaveAgentCarter). Seriously, the only episode I like less than this one is the It’s A Wonderful Life episode back in season 4. This one is at least a little fun.

Episode 12: “You Have To Be Joking (Autopsy Of The Devil’s Brain)”

“If there’s one thing I know, it’s that audiences get crazy over who ends up with who.” And thus we meet Adam, who I am completely convinced actually is Dawson Leary, who developed a drug habit after his TV show got cancelled, and he’s just waiting for Joey and Pacey to show up and pull him out of it. Anyway, Julian send Lucas to meet with Dawson, I mean Adam, who’s high on coke and loves Ravens but wants to change everything about it. Namely, he wants Lucas and Haley to get together, or to kill Haley, or at least one of the younger characters. This furthers the DC headcanon, Dawson is extrapolating his experience onto Lucas’s. He can’t decide if Haley is Joey or Jen, thus she either must die (Jen) or get together with Dawson (Joey,) although not how the story actually ended, how Dawson always made it end. Seriously, every damn time, Dawson told that story. But since Haley is neither Joey nor Jen, it doesn’t really work. (Honestly, Brooke is Jen, and Joey is kind of split up into Haley and Peyton. Also, Nathan is Pacey, complete with Daddy issues.)

Meanwhile, back in Tree Hill, Julian has set his sights on Brooke, professionally of course. He wants her to design the costumes for the movie. She doesn’t trust him so she turns him down. Also, like, everyone keeps acting Julian is this huge asshole, when really, he’s behaving like a perfectly sane adult. Not telling Lucas that he used to date Peyton is vaguely weird, but nothing else the dude has done has been sketchy. Anyway, Julian befriends Sam, who’s been hanging out with Jack Daniels, who is pretty damn adorable. Sam learns though that it was Jack’s brother who attacked Brooke, and we, the audience learn that he killed Quentin.

Nathan goes to a combine and kicks all the butts. Jaime tries to play piano in his talent show and tells jokes instead. Oh, and Millie finally snaps on the whole Gigi thing and gets drunk and sleeps with Owen, who’s crushed because a frantic Brooke finally told him she was absolutely done with him. Julian, meanwhile, is quietly looking for Sam on his own. And Peyton thinks she might have cancer.

Episode 13: “Things A Mama Don’t Know”

Turns our that Peyton does not have cancer. She’s just pregnant! Hooray! She spends the episode giving everyone pep talks because she’s sooo happy. Also, still in LA, Lucas meets Julian’s father who tries to convince him to fire Julian. Lucas, knowing from shitty fathers, tells him to shove up, but with way more agnst and eloquence because Lucas.

Millie tells Mouth that she slept with Owen when he tries to apologize for it and he can’t decide whether to forgive her or not. Also, Owen has been drinking, it turns out his spiral was pre Brooke fallout, which I actually like a lot better. He’s been on pain meds after a slamball injury, and Chase takes over at the bar so he can go get his act together. (Become a hot werewolf in Louisiana.)

Brooke decides that tracking down Jack would be a good way to find Sam. She goes to his house and has a weird creepy conversation with Jack’s brother, who has Sam tied up in the closet for reasons? Look, I’m just saying the every time the show tries to recreate the Psycho Derek dynamic it falls very short. But, Brooke winds up pulling her gun on Jack’s creepy brother. Also Julian shows up with Jack just in time. The police find Q’s wallet in the house and Brooke is about to have an existential crisis about that.

Nathan gets picked by a B Team in Charlotte, and has a rough first day. Mia is trying to write some new songs and also she and Chase bond and OMG OMG OMG. Also Jamie and Andre go to see Quentin’s grave. This is very sweet and sad.

Episode 14: “A Hand To Take Hold Of The Scene”

It’s a hangout episode! Lucas and Peyton babysit Jamie and Andre to “practice.” They get worn out. Chase and Mia go on a double date with Haley and Nathan and Brooke and Julian hang out and bond over their terrible parents. It’s pretty great.

Sam and Jack say goodbye as Jack gets ready to go into foster care and it’s pretty tough on her, and Millie and Mouth break up over the sex with Owen issue. It’s totally heartbreaking and sad and I want to hug them. I also want to hug Nathan and Chase when they get up on stage and sing “Bust A Move,” it’s not quite the strip tease to “It’s Tricky,” but it’s so much fun.

There’s not a lot going on plot wise in this episode but it’s a fun one, and that counts for something. Also, I wish we got more of Sam and Jack, they were really cute.

Episode 15: “We Change, We Wait”

“I am here for the girl in the book.” Julian and Brooke is amazing, and I don’t know why I ever denied that. (To be fair I didn’t, not really, I’m just obsessed with Brooke and Lucas is all…) Anyway, they’re together now, making out on Brooke’s couch and he gives her the Ravens jacket she made for him, and it’s the best thing ever.

Meanwhile, Lucas and Julian are having trouble picking a director. They don’t like anyone, and when Dawson rolls back into town with Julian’s dad, he winds up with the job. Literally no one is happy about this, but I do remember tweeting at the time, “if there isn’t a shot of Lucas standing in a rowboat I’m out of here.” That never happened, and it seems like a missed opportunity to this day.

Lucas also gives Peyton an engagement ring, which she gives back, instead asking for the Keith/Karen ring. So that’s cute. Nathan finally gets some playing time and Dan tells him that he’s proud of him. Which is actually kind of nice. Good for Dan. Mia writes a song and she and Chase are adorbs. Also it turns out that Paul and Peyton are kind of tight, which is a detail that I’ve always liked.

But mostly, you guys, Dawson in Tree Hill.

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

I love the movie arc, and not just because of the Dawson’s Creek stuff, although that doesn’t hurt. Julian is such a great character and the Mia and Chase and relationship is so stinking adorable I can barely stand it. I also love the Nathan comeback. This is just a really nice, fun run of episodes, with the exception of Jack’s brother, who never rises to the level of greatness of Psycho Derek, nor the complete bonkers fun of Nanny Carrie.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 6: Episodes 6-10

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Episode 6: “Choosing My Own Way Of Life”

There’s always been a weird undercurrent to how Peyton feels about her birth parents that I’m glad got addressed in this episode. I understand it was a convention of the show to have the parents (with the exception of Karen and Dan) being largely absent, but Larry Sawyer always seemed like a good guy and good dad, and Peyton really loved her mom, so this weird obsession with Ellie and now Mick always felt off. But, here, when she talks to him about why he and Ellie gave her up, and she realizes she had a great dad all along, that finally gets dealt with. It’s nice. I would have liked her to maybe throw a little guilt his way on Derek’s behalf, but we can’t have everything, can we?

Lucas goes to Omaha, and learns that no one cares about his dumb comet book. There is a fun Gossip Girl joke and he and Mouth decide to road trip back to Tree Hill together.

Millie and Brooke make a bucket list for Brooke, which gets interrupted, when Haley and Nathan find Sam sleeping in the school, and Haley suggests that Brooke foster her. Initially both Brooke and Sam are not super into this idea, but eventually come together and YAY! I’m so excited for this plot.

Nathan gets an offer to play a new sport called “Slamball” which is basically full contact basketball with trampolines, he’s nervous, but decides to go for it. Also Owen is on his team! Guys, Owen’s back! (I know it doesn’t end well, but I do so like looking at him…maybe when I’m done here, I’ll rewatch/finish True Blood…) 

Dan is spending time with Jamie, and Nathan tells him he’s not sure where they stand, but it’s nice to see these two hanging out together. Dan also thanks Deb for not putting him back in prison, and Skills gets nervous that Deb will get back with Dan.

Poor Skills, he should know by now how crazy those damn Scotts are, he’s been around them all long enough.

Brooke also finally tells Peyton what happened in the store and that she thinks Victoria was probably not actually behind it, but she’ll never know. Peyton reassures that they’re best friends and nothing will change that. It’s all very sweet.

Episode 7: “Messin’ With The Kid”

Sam is running away every night, and one of those nights, she goes to Tric and Owen brings her home. This brings Owen and Brooke to a reckoning and it’s actually really nice. He apologizes for bailing and explains his reasons. Brooke kind of half forgives him. She also lays down the law with Sam, after going to see Sam’s mom. It’s all very Degrassi.

Haley is trying to figure out a way back into music when she meets a busker, and they play together over the finale. She also calls a mom at Jamie’s school a bitch. It’s a pretty fun Haley episode.

Speaking of Jamie’s school, he’s getting picked on by a kid for wearing his cape all the time. He gets into a fight, and then Nathan show up and gives all of the kids capes. Then Jamie decides to not wear his anymore. It doesn’t sound like much but it’s actually a really sweet little B plot.

Lucas and Peyton get the real juice in this episode. Peyton reads an article about moving in together in Brooke’s magazine and a sitcom level combining of the stuff ensues. They try to have sex in Karen’s room, Lucas paints a line down the middle of the house, they flirt, it’s adorable.

Episode 8: “Our Life Is Not A Movie, Or Maybe”

It’s Julian time! I mean, not exactly just yet, but we do meet him and I forgot how creepy he is to start with.

Anyway, a mysterious producer, (Julian) contacts Lucas about turning An Unkindness Of Ravens into a movie. Said producer (Julian) shows up in Tree Hill and knows EVERYTHING about Lucas and the book, and they go out for drinks. He knows all of this because he’s obsessed with the book, oh and also he knows Peyton from somewhere. And that’s where we get creepy. But seriously, guys, Julian is here.

Owen is trying to win Brooke back and we get to see a little bit of Joe Manginello being adorable puppy dog man. Anyway, Sam throws a party at Clothes Over Bros, and Owen and Millie help Brooke break it up, but it’s not enough for how upset she gets. The party wrecks Peyton’s wedding dress.

Peyton goes to see Derek and talks to him about Mick, which is really nice, she basically tells him that he was very right about it. They decide to put on a USO show together and it’s kind of adorable. Because not only are we getting into Julian stuff, we’re getting some new Derek stuff.

So much good in this episode.

Episode 9: “Sympathy For The Devil”

It’s The Ballad of Peyton And Julian. For reasons defying explanation, Peyton has decided that she’s not going to tell Lucas that back in LA she and Julian were a couple. Like, a serious, in love, living together couple. He broke up with her because it was very clear she was still obsessed with Lucas, but they were together. They met not long after Peyton and Lucas broke up.

Julian is pretty earnest in his desire to adapt An Unkindness Of Ravens though and he really could give a shit that Lucas and Peyton are a couple. Which is refreshing on this show of hand wringing and belief that every relationship must be “the big forever love,” to quote another WB staple. (Angel, that’s from Angel). Lucas is pretty pissed when he figures it out though.

Lucas is also angsting about the screenplay because Julian insists that he write Keith’s death scene and Lucas doesn’t feel comfortable doing that. He eventually asks Dan what happened and is not satisfied with the answer. To be fair there really is no way to be satisfied by any answer.

Nathan gets knocked out playing Slamball and decides to quit. Nothing is worth losing his mobility again. You guys, Nathan learned. This is a very exciting development.

Owen and Brooke almost get back together, but then she realizes that Owen is not the guy for her. It’s kind of sad, because I do like him a lot, and hey, we get more naked Joe Manginello in this episode.

Gigi is also back and hitting on Mouth aggressively. He’s trying to keep her at arms length and Millie is really insecure about it. I hate this plot, not because it doesn’t work narratively, it does, but because it’s character assassination on Gigi.

Episode 10: “Even Fairy Tale Characters Would Be Jealous”

Peyton puts on a USO show at Derek’s base and a bunch of things come to a head, and by that I mean, everyone talks out their problems and things are pretty low drama, which is really a great thing about the later episodes. Things just, get resolved, which sticks with the emotional honesty of the show.

Anyway, Haley is nervous about performing again. Everyone tells her that she’s going to be great. And SHE IS!

Nathan is nervous about playing and talks it over with Q’s ghost. It’s been a while since we’ve seen a ghost, so I was happy to see him. Nothing really gets resolved here, except that when Haley gets home they have a nice romantic moment.

Lucas punches Julian, and Peyton is worried because she doesn’t know this and thinks that his reaction is too muted. They all talk about it and Lucas agrees to keep doing the movie. Also Julian and Brooke meet, and flirt a little. (SQUEE!)

Mia and Sam bond, which is cute. Also, Brooke might be getting a baby, and Sam things that this means she’ll have to leave. Brooke has no chance to tell her that this is not the case at all.

Millie comes home to Gigi passed out in her and Mouth’s bed and Mouth on the couch. She freaks out and goes to Brooke, explaining the situation. Then she talks to Mouth about it and tells Gigi that she’s on to her, and it’s all so good. 

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

I’m generally a fan of the quieter arc, and this one is no exception. The beginning of the movie stuff is awesome, as is the introduction of Julian, who works well as an agent of chaos and eventually as a member of the gang. I also love the idea that Peyton really did try to move on, but couldn’t get Lucas out of her heart. It gives the whole Lindsey thing a little more heft.

Also, it’s nice to see a ghost again. I love when this show has ghosts. I really love when anything has ghosts.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch Season 6 Episodes 1-5

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Episode 1: “Touch Me I’m Going To Scream Part 1”

This is another episode that’s very dear to my heart. It’s the first episode I watched in real time! Lucas has a series of fantasies of what his life will look like in a year, with each of the girls he might marry. Living the fabulous life in New York with Brooke, casual adorableness with Peyton or preppy perfection with Lindsey. He chooses Peyton and they’re off to Vegas to get married.

Nathan and Skills are working with the Ravens and everything about this makes me want to cry, because OMG Q!!!

Victoria returns and she’s threatening to take the company away from Brooke. Brooke is ready to fight, and she also catches a shop lifter! Guys, Sam! I’m so excited about this. As she closes up she gets attacked. And that’s the end of the episode.

Oh, also Carrie is the one who hit Dan with her car and she’s holding him prisoner because Dan might as well be on a different show all together.

Episode 2: “One Million Billionth Of A Millisecond On A Sunday Morning

I was dreading this episode. I mean, it’s a good episode, it’s just, so hard to watch knowing what happens next.

Deb and Skills are still sneaking around and everyone is noticing that they’re both acting weird, Jamie even sees them kissing but they convince him that they weren’t. (Or do they?) They’re well on the train to relationship town now, which is pretty great. I forgot how much I really like them together.

Nathan’s back is bothering him, and his doctor tells him to slow down a little bit, which he does, because as he tells Haley, as much as he loves basketball, he loves her and Jamie more. Aww. Anyway, during a workout with Q, he stops early, and they talk about the comeback.

Lucas and Peyton tell everyone that they’re engaged. Everyone is happy but also not even vaguely surprised. Brooke is dealing with being attacked and robbed, but the only person she tells is Deb. She tells everyone else that she fell down the stairs. Deb takes her to the shooting range, as she requested. Jamie asks Haley if they can make a superhero cape like his for Q, and they do.

Carrie reveals her full plan to Dan, which is to kill him and kidnap Jamie, for which he would be a prime suspect. He points out that his need for a new heart is a flaw in her plan and she kind of freaks out about it. Haley notices that Dan’s car has been outside of Jamie’s school again and gets nervous. Seriously, this all feels like it’s a completely different show from the quiet drama about the high school sweethearts getting back together. It’s great, just, a good reminder that the whole show didn’t go off the rails yet, just this one weird outlier storyline.

But after leaving practice Q stops to get something at a convenience store, which is in the middle of being robbed and is shot. Lucas wakes up to a phone call telling him that Q is dead.

Episode 3: “Get Cape, Wear Cape, Fly”

The Quentin funeral episode is one of the more emotional episodes of the show, in a very heartfelt way, though not quite as effective. Haley and Nathan struggle with telling Jamie about it. He seems to only half understand death, and insists on finishing the cape that he started making for him. He also befriends Q’s little brother Dre, and his mother praises the gang for working so hard to keep Quentin from drowning especially Haley.

Brooke is dealing with the aftermath of being attacked by going down to the shooting range and it’s cool to see Sophia Bush with a gun so long before Chicago PD, and her intensity in this storyline is insanely good and a huge switch up for the show. Her refusal to tell anyone what happened is awesome, but nothing quite beats Nathan’s speech to her about how they’re the two of the group who have the most in common.

The Carrie And Dan show continues to not really make a ton of sense, but the pieces are starting to fall together, we learn that Carrie lost a young son and is now looking to replace him. Dan assures her that there’s no way to fill the hole of a lost child.

 Deb reveals that she and Skills are together so that she can be there for him. It’s actually very sweet. We also get another quick moment with Sam, who wrote an essay about Q’s death even though she never really knew him. Sam is a much better writer than Lucas.

Episode 4: “Bridge Over Troubled Water”

Everyone is still dealing with losing Q but, given how these people deal with their breakups, they’re taking the unexpected and violent death of a young man they cared deeply for very moderately. Haley is probably the most shaken and Nathan is doing that thing where he takes an outside issue he can control rather than dealing with the thing he can’t. In this case, he takes on Skills and Deb’s relationship.

He basically throws Deb out of the house because he can’t deal with it. Everyone tells him he’s being ridiculous. Deb eventually breaks up with Skills over it, who then goes to Haley asking her to intervene with Nathan. She does, and Nathan basically agrees that the whole thing is none of his business.

Carrie breaks into the house to get some of Jamie’s stuff, for you know, when she kidnaps him? It’s weird and again, just doesn’t fit in with the rest of the show right now. It kind of bugs me.

Lucas and Mrs. Fields give very nice speeches to The Ravens about remembering Q. The team also plays a man down in order to honor Q. They lose but everyone feels pretty good about it. Peyton spends the day with a man named Mick, who knew Ellie and is quite obviously her biological father. Haley tries to reach out to Sam. It doesn’t go well.

Brooke goes to therapy and then confronts Victoria about the attack. Victoria swears that she didn’t do it, and they have a looonnnnggg talk about how Victoria never wanted children and never loved Brooke. What’s amazing about Victoria as a character is that somehow, in the later years, this show managed to create a parent you actually hate more than Dan. That’s hard.

Episode 5: “You Dug Your Own Grave, Now Lie In It”

A bunch of storylines get resolved here. Brooke has given her company to Victoria and is figuring out her next step. Nathan is interviewing with a B level team, but it turns out that they want him for coaching instead of playing. He turns them down.

Lucas goes to New York to figure out the next step with his book and also to tell Lindsey about him and Peyton. It does not go great. She kind of freaks out, but then she’s really nice about it. This is the last time we see her. Bye Lindsey, it was nice knowing you!

Peyton tries to get to know Mick better but he flakes on her. She’s very sad about it, and pouts into some candles while Elvis Costello play.

Carrie puts her plan into action. She calls Haley pretending to be a hospice nurse and says that Dan is dying. Haley brings Jamie to see him and say goodbye, when she realizes what’s happening. There’s a horror movie style chase and in the end Dan shoots Carrie and kills her.

The thing about the Carrie plot that I don’t like, aside from the fact that it doesn’t feel like it belongs with the rest of the show, is that it’s not as good as Psycho Derek, so the horror movie pay off doesn’t quite hit as well. But, Deb, smashing a bottle of champagne on her face is pretty damn effective, I’ll give the episode that.

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

I didn’t realize how disjointed the show feels at this point. The Dan and Carrie stuff is the biggest bit, but the Lucas and Peyton and then the Brooke story feel completely different than the Nathan and Haley stuff. It’s kind of a bummer, because individually it’s all good stuff, it just feels like none of it goes together.

Quentin’s death is handled quite nicely though. I live in a small town that’s had a couple of very bad years when it came to losing high school and college kids. Everything about how this story was handled felt very real and very on point. I was actually watching these episodes the day after the anniversary of my friend Lacey’s death at 19, the day before what would have been her birthday. Everything about them felt right. So I have to give the show credit for that.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 5 Episodes 15-18

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Episode 15: “Life Is Short”

It’s Jamie’s Birthday, which is weird, because I thought that Jamie was born on graduation day, and this episode takes place right before the playoffs? (Continuity! Come on people!) What does this very put upon five year old want? A Wii, and to see his grandpa. His grandpa also wants to see him, but Nathan, Haley and Deb are (rightfully) wary of any interaction with Dan, who, lest we forget, is basically the devil. Dan shows up at Jamie’s birthday party anyway and gives Jamie Nathan’s first jersey as a gift. When Nathan confronts him about it, he says that he’s dying and that he wants to leave Nathan the beach house. Nathan basically spits in his face.

Brooke is having trouble with Baby Angie, who just won’t stop crying. She also has to get a bunch of work done, and it’s not happening because of the baby and the inability to focus. It’s actually a really fun story and I particularly like the moment it creates with Lucas when she shows up on his doorstep looking for help.

Peyton, meanwhile has a long talk with Skills about how she and Lucas belong together, but she’s letting it go for the moment, because he doesn’t need that. I think this is very big of Peyton. But, as I’ve made pretty clear, I’m very into her this go round. Skills confesses he feels guilty about Jamie’s kidnapping and he’s pretty sure that Haley and Nathan no longer trust him with the kid.

This is categorically untrue, it’s just that they’re jumpy about Jamie lately and they say so when they all have a conversation about it. That’s another thing about One Tree Hill in general, but specifically Season 5 that I’m noticing, the characters actually talk to each other, so these kinds of conflicts don’t fester that much. It’s almost refreshing.

Lindsey comes to Jamie’s birthday party, which Lucas thinks is a sign that she wants to get back together. It’s actually just a sign of her wanting to come pick up her shit, but of course Mr. I Know How People Really Feel Even Though They Tell Me The Exact Oposite Lucas Scott doesn’t buy this.

Also, Deb hooks up with Jamie’s birthday clown. Oh Deb!

Episode 16: “Cryin’ Won’t Help You Now”

Dan is dying and The Scott clan has to decide what that means to them. Especially Nathan. Here’s a thing that’s always annoyed me about Lucas in the later seasons. His insistence that Nathan have the same or similar feelings as he does about Dan. Lucas didn’t really know Dan until he was teenager. Dan may have been an emotionally abusive father, but he did raise Nathan, which makes his emotions a lot more complicated when it comes to his father. Anyway, Nathan and Dan talk and Nathan tells him that he’s never going to forgive him.

Haley is dealing with the “what do we do about Jamie wanting to see Dan” issue, and she deals with it by having him write Dan a thank you note, but then she throws it away, which is probably going to come back to bite her in the butt.

Lucas and Skills are still trying to figure out what the Ravens are going to look like without Q, and land on a kind of crazy strategy of putting Q at point guard and having the rest of the team shoot three points to make up for his points. They got the strategy from Jamie, which is awesome. Q and Nathan also talk about their respective injuries and Nathan’s come back. Nathan commits to it, for Jamie.

Brooke pitches a line of baby clothes inspired by Angie, who is she is also getting ready for her heart surgery. I love Brooke with the baby. It’s something I’m really looking forward to seeing when I get to the stuff I haven’t watched yet, because Brooke actually becoming a mom is one of the only storylines I really regret missing out on.

Episode 17: “Hate Is Safer Than Love”

Lindsey ends things with Lucas, she’s met someone else. He’s really pissed and upset about it, especially since it happens in the middle of the Ravens game. He freaks out on the ref and then one of the players on the other team. He gets thrown out of the game and then goes to see Brooke at the hospital where she’s waiting for Angie to wake up from her surgery. Then goes to Tric to get drunk. Peyton gets him home he says that he hates her. Which is way harsh.

Brooke is in full freak out mode. But she’s also doing really well. She befriends Angie’s doctor and cries beautifully.

Jamie finds his note to Dan in the trash and runs away. Haley finds him and they talk about it, and in the end she lets him give it to Dan, telling Dan that this is for Jamie not for him.  Dan also learns that he’s number two on a heart donor list, behind a minister who’s lived a good life. Karma’s a bitch right?

Nathan is training again. He and Jamie go running in the mornings. It’s adorable and perfect. Haley is working on her album and Mia is back, chatting about life on the road and it gets Haley nervous about balancing her life. Peyton reassures her, that she’s going to be great, and that she shouldn’t be afraid for the album and any success that comes after that.

Oh also Skills and Deb hook up. Which is ridiculous. And awesome.

Everything is in free fall.

Episode 18: “What Comes After The Blues”

Lucas us depressed and all he’s doing is getting drunk and lying in bed. He wakes up one morning with a mohawk to Jamie and Nathan, mirroring Nathan waking up on the couch early in the season. Nathan tells him he needs to get it together. Jamie decides he also wants a Mohawk. So that’s a fun runner.

Lucas has been suspended for 10 games and there are only 11 left in the season. So that’s kind of a bummer. Lindsey stops by to say her final goodbye, but he also talks to Brooke as she gives Angie away and he sees the giant mural of The Cure’s “I Will Always Love You,” that Peyton painted on the river court.

Haley records a song and Nathan dunks again, also Jamie overcomes his fear of swimming. Which I didn’t know was a thing. Anyway, it’s really cute. Deb and Skills are still hooking up and Mouth quits his job. We get two big cliff hangers, Dan gets hit by a car when the Reverend dies and Lucas calls, someone and asks them to meet him at the airport and elope to Vegas.

Who is? Just kidding, we know who it is.

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

A lot more happens here than I remembered and there are few things that I love like I do the relationship between Jamie and Dan, which gets it’s sweetest moment here. I also love the beginning of Deb and Skills’s relationship just for pure whackiness, but there’s nothing more boring than the Lucas waffling. The Nathan comeback arc starts getting strong here, but it’s really at it’s best in Season 6.

Overall Analysis of This Season

Season 5 is kind of a bummer, because it starts out so strong and then just sort of peeters out. But the first half really is crazy good, and I actually really enjoy the Lucas and Lindsey relationship, even if it does cause us to see Peyton at her worst. The Brooke stuff this season and the Naley stuff really is great, and it introduced us to Joe Manginello, and I really can’t emphasize this enough, this is something that we all need to thank One Tree Hill for. Think of what Magic Mike and True Blood would be without him? Not as good, is what they’d be. (Honestly, I’m writing a blog about One Tree Hill, do you really think that I’m above Vampires Have Sex: The Show and Shirtless Dancing Men: The Movie?)

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 5 Episode 11-14

Only four episodes this week, partly because I’m a little behind, and partly to even out the posts. This season has 18 episodes, so, 4 this week, and 4 next week!

OTH Season 5

Season 5: Episode 11: “You’re Gonna Need Someone On Your Side”

Lindsey and Lucas spring a Parent Trap for Haley and Nathan. Also Chace comes back! YAY Chace! And Rachel and Mouth interact. But we’ll get to that. First Lucas and Lindsey’s parent trap. They decide to have a big party for both of their bachelor and bachelorette, thus forcing the estranged couple to talk.

Jamie sees a family in a store playing rock band and fixates on it as something he wants to do as a family. I love this, because even though it’s a clear product placement, that kind of fixation is so something that little kids do that it really works. They also get a bounce house, because Skills is emotionally about the same age as Jamie.

Meanwhile, Brooke, Owen, Lucas and Lindsey go to Macy’s as Brooke prepares for a meeting. But Victoria took the meeting without her. Because EVIL. Brooke winds up firing Victoria, who also goes to Brooke and Peyton’s house where Rachel is detoxing and breaks down her already fragile self esteem. Ugh, Victoria is just the absolute worst.

Also, Dan is out of prison, and he had sex with a random girl he met at a sporting goods store. Also, he seems determined to meet Jamie.

This is when this is creepy, before Dan and Jamie’s relationship became one of the biggest hearts of the show.

Season 5: Episode 12: “Hundred”

It’s Lucas and Lindsey’s wedding day and every one is daydreaming. Nathan is daydreaming about coming home to his family. Peyton is daydreaming about interrupting the wedding. Brooke is daydreaming about becoming a mom.

Also, Karen is back! With Lily! And she’s with Andy! It’s all awesome. Andy now looks exactly the same age as the kids, which is completely hilarious. But I always loved that they ended up together.

Dan shows up at the wedding and Haley tells him off. It’s a great Haley moment. Also, Nathan is trying really hard to talk to her and it’s terribly sweet. Lindsey leaves Lucas at the altar, because she realizes that Lucas is still in love with Peyton from his second book.

And then the crazy explodes. After going to the bathroom, Jamie is snatched by Carrie, who then takes him to a motel and tells him that he’s going to be her son now. She tries to die his hair. Then Dan breaks in and puts her into a wall and returns him to the house, where Nathan and Haley and everyone are being very worried and Skills is feeling guilty, because he didn’t go with Jamie to the bathroom.

Season 5: Episode 13: “Echoes, Silence, Patience And Grace”

It’s the look at the camera and talk about their feelings episode. And it’s a good one. Nathan and Haley are in couples counseling. Brooke is being interviewed by an adoption agency. Peyton is talking to Max who used to own the record store. Lucas is talking to Andy and then Lindsey. Dan is talking to his Parole Officer. Jamie is in show and tell at school.

Haley and Nathan are trying to fix their marriage and it’s not going super well. They are talking and Nathan is back in the house. They talk a lot about losing their identities as a basketball player and a musician respectively. They talk about giving up their youth to raise their son. They reconnect. It’s quite lovely.

Brooke describes wanting to be a parent to save a child from having the kinds of neglected love starved childhood she had. It’s really touching. But in the end we learn that Victoria torpedoed her chances by disclosing every dirty secret of Brooke’s life.

Peyton talks about Lucas, and loving Lucas and how she feels awful for how heartbroken he is at the moment. It’s actually really nice and heartfelt. Max also tells her not to give up on music, since her opening the label changed Mia’s life and will change other people’s lives.

Jamie talks about how his bunny is his best friend. And his grandpa Dan. Speaking of Dan, he’s so into getting his family back together that it’s deluded and sad. He also pays his PO to talk to him. This is remarkably sad, but then again, even when he was super powerful, no one actually liked Dan, so I’m guessing he didn’t have a lot of friends.

Lucas talks to Andy about how he wants Lindsey back. Literally no one believes this is the case. Especially Lindsey. He says he’ll only publish the new book if she edits it. She’s kind of “whatever” about that.

Season 5: Episode 14: “What Do You Come Home To?”

Brooke’s getting a baby! Temporarily, but it’s meant to be a test run with the adoption agency. She’s fostering baby Angie while she is in the country to get a surgery. Brooke is over the moon about it, but as it turns out, Owen is not into the idea of having a family. He doesn’t even have the guts to tell her this himself, Chace has to do it.

I love Chace.

Anyway, Lucas is back and he and Peyton basically forgive each other, but she still feels bad. He’s annoyed though, because Q is refusing to admit the extent of his injury. Q told Skill about it but asked him to keep it from Lucas. Obviously, Skills does not keep it from Lucas. (Obviously.) Q gets really mad about this and calls Skills an Uncle Tom.

This righteously pisses Skills off, and there is no resolution. One Tree Hill does not often tackle race. And when they do it feels pretty on, because it just sort of hangs there.

Mouth asks Millie to move in with him and she accepts but also tells him that she’s a virgin. He doesn’t care. It’s adorable. Peyton and Haley decide to record an album together. Everyone debates whether to tell Jamie that Dan is a murderer…AND Deb comes back to be Jamie’s new nanny and it’s really exciting, because I mean, DEB!

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

Because it’s a short one, and we’re again dealing with moves that need to happen to get to end game, which is Peyton and Lucas reunited, there’s not a whole lot to say. But there’s good stuff here. It’s the deepest we’ve gotten into Nathan and Haley’s fundamental differences in a while, and it’s nice to be reminded that their love didn’t completely erase who they are. The kidnapping plot and Carrie Single White Female stuff is really the show at it’s soapy best. As is Lindsey leaving Lucas at the altar.

And at that, we’re nearing the goodbye to Lindsey, who, I know I keep saying it, is a character I really, really like. But you know, as a Team Jacob, “On My Own” singing, Galinda-phile, this makes perfect sense. I feel for the spare in a love triangle. (Brooke long transcended that role.) And I think Lindsey is good at that.

I’m looking forward to “Brooke as Mom,” and really, the Peyton and Lucas reunion is pretty epic.

Anything Other Than Me: One Tree Hill Rewatch: Season 5: Episode 6-10

OTH Season 5

Season 5: Episode 6: “Don’t Dream It’s Over”

So much comes to a head in this episode and it’s so beautiful. Jamie has been having nightmares about Dan because Skills told him that Dan is in prison and not dead, as he’d always thought. Lucas has a stress dream about Lindsey turning him down the way that Peyton did. He confronts Peyton about that night and they have a big screaming match about how he’s a big entitled baby. This is after she tells Haley that she doesn’t like Lindsey and Lindsey hears.

It’s very dramatic. And seriously, poor Lindsey. I really do pity her.

Meanwhile, Carrie has started hitting on Nathan, subtly but it’s happening. Haley is noticing and is trying to put boundaries up, but Carrie is smashing through those boundaries.

Mouth has been having an affair with his boss and that is also not going terribly well, but he’s at least enjoying himself. Mia tries to play for Victoria and chokes, which actually leads, in a round about way to the whole Peyton meltdown.

Oh, also Haley and Lucas come up with the plan of having Q read Les Miserables in order to stay eligible to play ball. And that is a really hard assignment and absolutely awesome. I half expected it to be The Grapes Of Wrath though, because that’s Lucas’s favorite book.

Season 5: Episode 7: “In da Club”

Everyone heads to Tric for a party night and of course there’s tons of tension because of the Peyton and Lindsey issue. Lucas is still determined for them to get along and everyone is like, why? Listen to your friends Luke, they are wise and understand that you are a massively huge dumbass. Anyway, Lindwhole night flirting sey finally tells him off, and he goes to Peyton to be all, what’s your problem, and they kiss. But then he asks Lindsey to marry him. Ugh, the whiplash.

Mia is performing and she’s got stage fright. K-Fed shows up and heckles her but she kicks ass just to prove him wrong. Then he’s obnoxious to Haley and Nathan gets in his face. Haley gets Nathan to back down, but Q punches him in the face instead. It’s a pretty great scene. Haley then gets pissed at Nathan about it. But she’s actually pissed because she saw the Lucas and Peyton kiss.

Brooke spends the night trying to flirt with Owen the bartender and keep Victoria from being completely embarrassing. Mouth and Millie go on a date. Carrie spends the night agressively hitting on Nathan and he does not shut her down. It’s pretty gross and awful.

Season5: Episode 8: “Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want”

Lucas and Lindsey are engaged! Peyton is heartbroken over it, and I don’t really blame her. this is a terrible set back for her, but also, Haley is right about the fact that when she said no, she gave Lucas the space to move on and she can’t be angry about it. But that doesn’t stop Peyton from being really, really mad.

Brooke, meanwhile, is still in the flirt circle with Owen. He’s being infuriatingly opaque with her, and while I absolutely love that she pulls the old school naked in his back seat move in response to his “what’s under all the clothes, Brooke Davis?” question, there’s nothing better than her ranting to Jamie about how annoyed she is by him.

Mouth and Millie watch a ballet together and have their first kiss. It’s adorable. Also, Mouth gets a shot to cover the next Raven’s game.

While proposing, Lucas lets Lindsey know that he was waiting to propose until he wrote a second book, because he’s afraid that just being a basketball coach won’t be enough for her. This is actually very nice, and Lindsey’s response is also great. I actually really like Lindsey, even though she’s just doomed. Meanwhile, Haley’s really busy with school and Mia and Carrie is picking up more slack at home and entrenching herself further with Nathan and Jamie, and even kisses Nathan.

But the crazy still hasn’t come out yet. I’m waiting for the crazy.

Season 5: Episode 9: “For Tonight You’re Only Here To Know”

It’s the first Raven’s game of the season, and everyone is meditating on the past and also Carrie quits, right as Nathan was about to tell Haley about the kiss. He still feels guilty. That’s kind of the only Nathan action this episode.

Lucas makes a rousing speech to the new Ravens, and gives them uniforms. Skills and Q are also there. Q has an adorable scene with Jamie. Mouth is narrating the episode as he puts together his story. He and Lucas meditate on Jimmy and Keith. It’s sweet.

The meat of the episode comes though, when through shenanigans, Peyton, Mia, Brooke, Haley and Lindsey find themselves locked in the library and Peyton and Lindsey have it out. We also learn a bit more about the Lindsey and Mia tries to take the conversation to a more positive place. It doesn’t quite work but the idea isn’t a bad one. Overall it’s a good episode, and the bonding that takes place feels genuine, if shallow. Brooke’s refusal to explain her relationship with Victoria is still annoying though. (And to accept that it’s dysfunctional.)

Anyway, they all get out because Tim delivers them a pizza! I’d missed Tim, he named his son Nathan…of course he did. Just everything about this appearance is perfect.

Season 5: Episode 10: “Running To Stand Still”

When Nathan and Jamie get home from the game, Nathan takes a shower and Carrie gets in with him. He freaks, and Haley comes in and she freaks and kicks him out of the house. He goes to Lucas’s where they learn that Dan is up for parole.

This is not a good night for Nathan.

Brooke decides to take Owen to New York to show him her life, but that’s interrupted when they find Rachel OD’d in Brooke’s apartment. It’s great to see Rachel again and especially great to see her be a complete train wreck. We learn that Owen is 8 years sober and he advises Brooke to be a good friend and that he remains unimpressed with her trappings. “What’s under all the clothes Brooke Davis?” is repeated. Oh, and also the world is introduced to shirtless Joe Manginello.

As shirtless Joe Manginello is now an important institution of the entertainment industry, I think we should thank the show for that.

Lucas and Nathan go to Dan’s parole hearing to argue that he should not get out. Dan makes a speech about always loving Karen and regretting abandoning Lucas. He gets out about it. Peyton and Mia make a deal with her old boss that gives them a bigger stage but maintains their autonomy, because of magic? I don’t really get the mechanics of this deal.

Oh also, Carrie shows up at Jamie’s school and tells him that she wants him to be her little boy. The crazy is beginning. She also thinks Nathan is in love with her. While Nathan and Haley fight about her, Jamie falls in the pool and after saving him, Haley screams that she wants a divorce.

Overall Analysis Of This Arc

There’s so much place setting in this arc, and none of it does much of anything. You know Lucas won’t marry Lindsey. You know that Haley and Nathan won’t split up. (And not just because I’ve watched the show before, because of how this show works.) The only thing that’s even remotely intriguing is the Brooke and Owen stuff, and even that’s not…great…it’s a shame because this season starts so strong but the middle is kind of blah.

Mia’s great though. And now Dan’s out of prison.