I Don’t, Not, Like You

Justice League

I spend a lot of time thinking about superheroes. (Obviously). Less lately, but still, a lot of time.

I wonder sometimes if I didn’t think about superheroes so much, if I’d be able to enjoy superhero movies more, which then leads me to believe that it depends on the movie. Batman V Superman: Dawn of Wonder Woman made me think about Grant Morrison, about ambitious storytelling, and about big ideas and superheroes. (In all honesty, I was pretty drunk when I saw that movie. Every other time I’ve tried to watch it, I fall asleep.)

Justice League didn’t make me think about any of that, but, I definitely enjoyed it more than BVS, but this was a fanservice movie, and I’m a fan. This is a movie where Alfred teases Bruce Wayne about having a crush on Wonder Woman. This movie is not for beginners. (Something I also said about Man Of Steel by the way.) There’s too much buried in there, too much history that’s unspoken and hasn’t been laid out in other movies. Too many moments like Cyborg saying, “Boo-Ya” as he hacks a Mother-Box. Too many oblique references to Apokalips, and Darkseid. Too many half asses explanations of Atlantis and Arthur Curry’s life.

But overall, the movie was good, enjoyable, well performed. (GIVE AFFLECK WHATEVER HE WANTS TO KEEP HIM AROUND! HE IS GREAT!) Not a world shaker, but you know, not everything has to be.

Oh, Also, you know Gal Gadot and all of the Amazons are amazing, but we knew this, so, there you go!


  1. Wonder Woman
  2. The Big Sick
  3. Battle Of The Sexes
  4. Dunkirk
  5. Spider-Man: Homecoming
  6. Guardians of The Galaxy: Volume 2
  7. Thor: Ragnarok
  8. Justice League
  9. King Arthur: Legend of The Sword
  10. The Dark Tower
  11. Cars 3
  12. Pirates of The Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales


Alpha: Puppies! The origin story. No but in reality this movie looks SUPER dumb, but the dogs look cute

I don’t remember any of the other trailers…which does not bode well…

Never Forget, We’re The Bad Guys


If nothing else, Suicide Squad completes DC’s pivot away from the gritty “realism” and philosophical meditations on the nature of man and urban decay as presented by Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy and towards, well, comic books.

For better or worse, Suicide Squad wears it’s comic book roots on it’s spandex sleeve. I happen to think that’s for better, but it’s apparent that many critics feel it’s for the worse, because this movie is not doing well in the press.

And for that reason, I’m giving the movie a whole lot of latitude. A lot of it doesn’t work, but it’s pretty much impossible for me to a hate a movie where the first time Harley Quinn lays eyes on Amanda Waller she asks, “Are you the devil?” And Waller responds, “Maybe.”

Or where Batman drops out of the sky on Deadshot in an alley and tries to get him to back down peacefully, but when he doesn’t kicks the crap out of him.

Or where Captain Boomerang and Katana exist.

And where Amanda Waller is allowed to be “The Wall” in all of her grey moraled, stoic, refuse to budge, badass glory.

Overall, I really enjoyed the ride. The performances especially, (Will Smith in particular is excellent) and the mission, rescuing Waller from a city that’s being devestated by The Enchantress is a good one. The team, Deadshot, Harley, Captain BBoomerang, Killer Croc, Diablo and Slingshot, is a solid group of DC B-Listers (and Harley), lead and watched over by Katana (A fun addition, but not enough to make up for her deletion from Arrow, IMO) and Task Force X mainstay Rick Flag.

And while I loved pretty much everything that Margot Robbie did with Harley, and liked what Jared Leto was doing with The Joker, their flashback subplots were what weakened the movie. I get why they’re there, you’re average viewer doesn’t quite know Joker and Harley’s deal, but they didn’t seem to fit with everything else.

The thing is, I got something I’d been wishing for for a very long time in this movie, and that’s Viola Davis’s performance as Amanda Waller. She’s always been my number choice for that character, because she’s just so good at selling seriousness and bad assness, and is a physical match for the character and all. The post credit scene, which has her facing off in an empty restaurant against Bruce Wayne is a dream for comic book fans. (Affleck brings it once again in his three scenes, and Ezra Miller’s blink and you miss it moment as Barry Allen is also pretty damn great.)

Suicide Squad is head and shoulders above Man of Steel and Batman V Superman, though it can’t quite stand up to Marvel’s top tier efforts, it’s certainly not any weaker than the competition’s middle tier efforts. (It’s better than Iron Man 2, and about the same as Thor: The Dark World or The Incredible Hulk) But it most certainly does it’s job as the opening of a new chapter for DC movies. I’ll take it, is my point.


  1. The Nice Guys
  2. Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping
  3. Ghostbusters
  4. Captain America: Civil War
  5. Star Trek Beyond
  6. X-Men: Apocalypse
  7. The Legend Of Tarzan
  8. Suicide Squad
  9. Finding Dory
  10. Independence Day: Resurgence
  11. Alice Through The Looking Glass


Assassin’s Creed looks like, so freaking good, you guys. So good. Insanely good.

The Magnificent Seven – You could show me a blank screen with that cast’s names scrolling past, end it with, “From The Direction of Training Day and The Equalizer” and I’d still be in for it. That the movie actually looks good, well, that’s just icing on the cake.

War Dogs – YAWN, snooze. I have no interest in this movie, like at all.

The Wall – Looks interesting. I understand we’re supposed to be mad at this movie from a social justice perspective because it’s about a white dude.

WONDER WOMAN – Trailer on the big screen made me cry like a baby. A proud, feminist baby. Even if no one else seems to be liking it much DC films is giving me what I want, so I can’t really complain.

Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice: On Ambition


As the final push into Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice was made, and I finished up season 2 of Daredevil,  I found myself wondering if the movie would feel too much like a Frank Miller comic book. Not that I would mind, I like a lot of Miller’s work, but after 13 episodes of what felt like Miller’s world, I wasn’t sure I wanted a movie of it.

And there is absolutely no way to deny that Miller’s DNA is all over the movie. But he’s too deeply engrained in Batman as we know him now to be erased. So that’s all there, the “sons,” the clunky epic speechifying, the brutal violence, it’s all there.

But as I sat back and watched, I realized that this didn’t feel like a Frank Miller story at all. It felt like a Grant Morrison story and for that reason, I was able to sit back and enjoy it all the more, because I don’t love any comic writer the way that I love Morrison. (And that includes Kelly Sue DeConnick and Gail Simone…I adore them, but Morrison is something different.)

Like a Morrison story this movie is ambitious, heavy, nonsensical at times, full of on the nose symbolism, and sort of impenetrable to newbies. It’s also very messy, which is not really an accusation you can hurl at Morrison, but I mean in spirit.

Elements of the movie are perfect. Affleck is great. I did go in rooting for him, but that means that if he’d been bad I would have been really disappointed. (Hello, Michael B. Jordan and Miles Teller in Fantastic Four…) He’s such a solid choice for this role, and we get to see things we’ve never really seen on screen. (BRUCE IN THE LAB!!!!)

The thing that made both Aless and I happiest is that we skip the Lois and Clark relationship drama. They’re together. They’re a team. That’s it. The end. There are issues, she isn’t sure he should risk the innocent lives that seem to fall around Superman for her sake. He can’t bring himself to not save her. Honestly, if it weren’t for the music and desaturated color scheme the scene where Superman saves Lois in the first twenty minutes would have been absolutely perfect.

Gal Gadot and the energy she brings to Wonder Woman is amazing. The story comes to life with her and she’s the impetus for Bruce to actually do him some sleuthing. Also, how good Gadot and Affleck look together has even brought me around to Bruce/Diana shipping. (You may recall, I have some opinions on that score…) Her movie is going to be SICK, because she owns Diana.

The Doomsday fight is fine, if unnecessary, the movie would have been streamlined by simply having the Luthor storyline, which involves him manipulating Batman and Superman to fight each other. (In fact, the final fight only happens because he kidnaps Matha Kent and tells Supes that she’ll be killed if he doesn’t kill Batman.) This is a good contrivance, and while the potential fridging of Martha is dangerous, it’s worth it to create a new framework for the smackdown. But without Doomsday they would have needed another reason for Wonder Woman to suit up, so there’s that.

The Justice League set up is probably the best part of the movie, including a brilliant reveal that I won’t spoil.

Batman v Superman isn’t a great movie. It’s either an adequate movie or an ambitious and interesting failure and I can’t decide which yet. Parts of it remind me of Iron Man 2, in the bad way, but in the end it’s worth it to see the Big Three on screen together.

Jesse Eisenberg is a huge disappointment. Or maybe the script. Either way, I’m not into weird crazy Luthor. The only time Luthor should feel unhinged is when there’s rage happening. Otherwise he should hold it together.

Overall the movie has more good than bad for me, but I can’t really recommend it to people who don’t really love these characters and aren’t overly attached to a particular version. It’s a specific niche, but a worthwhile one. It did set up an interesting world, and honestly, I think the other films, which are out of Snyder’s peculiar control (The Ben Affleck/Geoff Johns helmed Batman solo movie in particular) should be really good.

Look, if it means a lot to you to see Batman and Superman punch each other, get your butt to the Cineplex. Because that definitely happens here.

You Owe Them Nothing

So, I don’t know about the rest of you but I had a nice quiet weekend, and did absolutely nothing even remotely attached to fandom and the nerd work.

I’m kidding.

Obviously. It was San Diego Comic Con weekend. I wasn’t there. If I was there I’d be sleeping right now and I would be currently jumping up and down like a maniac that I had just been to San Diego Comic Con. (I am going to try to go next year…truly…there are things happening…)

But I did have a lovely weekend at Chrissy and Glen’s house, and we drank beers and watched Game of Thrones, and checked newsfeeds, and saw Minions (review coming Thursday)

And of course we spent a good amount of time talking about Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice and the amazing trailer that came out.

And while lots of things that got me excited came out of Comic Con. (Lumberjanes won the Eisner for best new comic for instance! WOOO!)  Nothing else mattered after watching that trailer on Saturday. Since I’m sure we’ve all watched, it, I’ll just link to it on Youtube again, so that we can all watch it again.

I don’t know what you all were most excited about but, I think my favorite part was ALL OF IT!

I mean, we now know some things, like this movie will be fairly brightly colored, that Batfleck has been around for 20 years, and that he was in Metropolis for the climax of Man Of Steel.

I like all of this.

We don’t know how Wonder Woman features in this movie, but she seems important and she looks amazing.

Also there is Luthor, and he looks like a real dick head.

But for the most part, I just can’t get over how at the very least, the trailer seems to be selling everything that I want the movie to be. I’m no longer ambivalent. This is the real deal. I want this movie now. Like, immediately. Let’s not see Ant-Man this weekend, let’s just all go see Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Wonder Woman instead.

I'm just throwing this up again...for...reasons

I’m just throwing this up again…for…reasons


I wanted to say something really involved or cool about the new pictures that we got yesterday, but here’s the thing.

I’m too excited to get overly analytical about them, and that’s a good thing.

Lex Luthor

He looks like Zuckerberg, which is fine. The hair is a nice touch, I wish it was more Red, but this works.


Mmmmmm, Ben…in tux….mmm…Gal in awesome dress…so long as this doesn’t lead to them together, I just really love this picture.




He’s very, very handsome. Also the full color costume looks good. Well, better. I like it, I guess is my point.


Not sure what’s happening here, but Ben looks good. It’s exciting.

And then of course there’s the big one!

EW Cover

THEY LOOK SO GOOD! WONDER WOMAN IS SUCH A BADASS! I’m obsessed with this costume, and have been since I first saw it, but seeing it in color only helps it a whole lot! I love the whole shebang!

I have a feeling that we’re going to be getting even more things next weekend, as comic con rages one.

I hope everyone Stateside has an awesome Fourth of July! I’m off to the beach! See you soon!

Ben As Bruce: Better than Batfleck?


So I know I’m a few days late on this, and I don’t normally report on grainy half baked set footage, but I mean, come on, this is our first glimpse of Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne, and I would be remiss not to talk about it.

After all, I’m me.

I’ve mentioned before that in many, many ways, I feel like playing Bruce Wayne in a movie is way more important to that movie’s success than playing Batman. It’s certainly more difficult. As much as I love The Dark Knight Trilogy, the one thing that I never quite bought was that portrayal of Bruce Wayne the man. Except for Begins we know very little about Bruce, who he is, and how he deals with his life. And I find that stuff interesting.

It’s why “Bat-Dad” is basically my favorite incarnation. Why I think I like “Death of The Family” better than “Court of The Owls,” despite the fact that “Court of The Owls” is technically a much, much stronger story. Why I prefer Batman Beyond & The New Batman Adventures to the initial run of Batman: The Animated Series.  And frankly, I think that it’s the incarnation that will work best for this particular universe. Yes, Bruce should be kind of cranky and detached, but there should be a small group of people who know that it isn’t that case. Dick, Barbara, Tim and Alfred, and to a lesser extent Jason, fight for this man because they know that he’ll do what’s best. Damian’s a different story, he fights to prove himself to his father…let’s not go down that particular rabbit hole though, because it’s a sad one.  And I’d like to see that shown in this movie, and not just so I can see my favorite characters, but because I think that it’s an element that Ben Affleck could play very well.

And the reason I think that is because of one particular scene in Argo.

When he sits down at that kitchen with the people who don’t want to go with him and explains that he does know what he’s doing and they have to trust him. That’s a Bruce Wayne moment. It’s the moment that, for a movie where he will more than likely be teaming up with a reluctant Superman, will have to play. You need that moment when these two men decide to trust one another. And I think it’s a moment that Affleck is the guy to play and that suits the “Bat-Dad” personality best.

But if you want an example of the rougher more vengeance minded Batman, who is a good deal more likely to be in this movie, and who I also think Affleck will do pretty well, I suggest you watch any of his speeches from the latter half of Dogma. Or just watch Dogma. Because it’s a really good movie. And he’s really good in it. He plays an angel, and there’s poop monster, and Chris Rock and Alanis Morrisette is God.

Sorry, I just really like that movie.

Anyway, we’re just going to have to wait until March 25, 2016 to see. Which by the way, is interesting. We were all wondering who was going to blink in the Cap 3/Dawn of Justice staring contest and it was DC. It’s good news for me, because now I don’t have to hold this movie up against other Movie Season movies, and specifically against a Captain America movie…which, given how I feel about the first two of those it would probably lose against.

And I don’t want to have to choose between Steve and Bruce. Because for a movie? I don’t know that Bruce would win that fight. In comics? Of course he would.

Because I mean, let’s face it, wouldn’t just be Steve fighting Bruce. It would be like Sam Wilson vs. Dick Grayson, which would be a decent fight, Jason vs. Bucky (Jason wins that. Jason wins that fight EVERY TIME!) Ugh, such a good fight.

But in choosing which movie to go see? I might pick Cap.

But it’s a cow’s opinion at this point. It’s just moo.

Got The Picture

I had this great plan to write up my feelings about the first season of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. today. But then obviously the whole world exploded. Because, he who holds all future happiness in his hands, Zack Snyder has leaked pictures of The Batmobile and a picture of Ben Affleck as Batman.

It’s a thing of beauty.

So stinking beautiful

So stinking beautiful

So even though I have now watched the final episode of Agents, my mind is entirely clouded by this image. (But also, that finale made my brain explode, in a good way. Stay tuned, we’ll talk about it tomorrow.) This image is the only thing in the world at this moment. It has consumed everything. There is no sun, there is no air. There is only Ben Affleck and The Batmobile. Because you guys, can we just, I mean, really? It’s so great. Just, great. I mean, it looks awesome. I’m starting to really look forward to Man of Steel 2: We CAN TO Beat Cap, again. (Last time I wrote about it, you may remember, I was starting to lose faith.)

Anyway, not much to say. It looks very Frank Miller, but I think we all saw that one coming. And I mean, I just, ugh, I’m having trouble coming up with the words for this one, you guys, just, it makes me so happy. So happy. Like, babbly, this is so awesome. I haven’t been this happy since Ben’s casting was announced. You guys remember that? Remember how I didn’t want to talk about anything else for a while? This might be like that. It’s OK though, because I made that rule, and you won’t hear more from me about this until June. I promise.

In other Bat-news, Gotham will be on Mondays at 8. Which means that I will have to come up with some witty cute thing to do on Tuesdays for it. Or maybe Wednesday, to give myself some time to watch the episode.

I don’t know. I have a few months. I’ll figure it out. But for now. BATMOBILE! BATFLECK! AHHHH, SQUEE!

If you were the creator of Lexcorp, you would have created Lexcorp

While I obviously didn’t join in the collective rending of garments that ensued when Ben Affleck was cast in Man of Steel: Wait That Guy?, I am starting to wonder what exactly Zach Snyder is planning for this movie to be. Because with today’s news that Jesse Eisenberg will be taking on the role of Lex Luthor, I find myself thinking, wait, really?

I mean, really?

I mean, really?

I like Jesse Eisenberg, a lot. And in fact, if he plays Lex Luthor the way he played Mark Zuckerberg, this is going to be an interesting movie. Actually, I think it’s going to be an interesting movie none the less, with Holden McNeil as Batman, a Superman who kind of blends into the background, and Israeli Wonder Woman and a thirty year old character actor as the main bad guy. Like I said back when Affleck was announced, I’m really excited about the sort of out of the box casting choices, but this one really came out of left field. And unlike Affleck, who’s work I really love, and Gal Gadot who’s a wild card, I’m just not sure I can see Eisenberg taking on this character, who is, frankly, kind of difficult to pull off.

But, as I’ve said, there’s a reason why I write a blog about this stuff and the guys that make this stuff make it. And as I’ve said a million times, I really liked Man of Steel, so I’m willing to give it the benefit of the doubt, but I’m just starting to wonder if Man of Steel: Zuckerberg’s Revenge isn’t going to be kind of a mess. (I’ve also stated that I’d be happy to watch the train wreck as well.)

In tandem with this announcement came the news that Jeremy Irons is going to be playing Alfred. Being that Irons is British and over 50, this is less of a surprise and more of a, “Yeah, OK, that guy.”

Also, Eisenberg as Lex Luthor does allow you to rewatch The Social Network as a movie about Luthor double crossing Peter Parker…so that’s kind of fun.

The Social Network

Obviously, that was Sorkin & Fincher’s Original Intent.

Good Luck, Sir: Runner, Runner

Runner Runner

As I sat watching Justin Timberlake and Ben Affleck grin and laugh their way through Runner, Runner I realized how many really fantastic movies there are about gambling, gamblers and casino culture.

Yes, Runner, Runner reminded me of 21 the not as good as this movie about MIT kids who go to Vegas and count cards, and yes it reminded me of Justin Timberlake’s other big box office moment, The Social Network, but primarily I was thinking about a Rat Pack Musical about a prohibition era Chicago speakeasy and Casino called Robin and The Seven Hoods. I don’t know why that’s the one I thought of, but I’ve had “My Kind of Town (Chicago)” stuck in my head.

Anyway, my craziness aside, Runner, Runner was very good and has been sent to the top of the list for “things to look at to show that Ben Affleck is going to be a good Batman.” His character Ivan Block is a straight up bad guy bastard, don’t get me wrong. There’s not a sniff of anti hero on this guy, but his behavior, throwing lavish parties he doesn’t care about, posing with trappings of wealth to divert attention from his real deal is Bruce Wayne to a tee. The scene where he throws a couple of government officials into croc infested waters only to pull them back from the brink was a Batman move if ever I’ve seen one.

Of course everything Affleck does for the next two years is going to be studied by people like me to see how it will fit into what he’s going to do as Batman.

I’ll try not to focus on that moving forward, because the guy will probably have a few movies coming out in between.

Anyway, Gemma Atherton is also in this movie as The Girl. Generally it drives me nuts when an actress as talented as Atherton is wasted on The Girl, but she does a good job and really there isn’t a single character that steps out of their type. Affleck is “The Charming Bad Guy,” Timberlake is “The Wide Eyed Kid,” Anthony Mackie is “The Fed.” But God, it’s a good formula that I’d watch over and over again, especially with a cast this charismatic.

Richie Furst (Timerlake) is the son of a gambler who lost his shirt working for a hedge fund and is attending Princeton to get is Masters in Finance. He’s paying for school by recruiting to online gambling sites. When the administration finds out they shut him down. Furst then bets his savings in an online poker game and find out that the site cheated him. He decides to go to Costa Rica and confront Block, who owns the site. Recognizing Furst’s exceptional mix of abilities, Block hires him.

Then the feds get involved and a twist ending worthy of The Sting (another favorite movie of mine about gamblers) hits.

Runner, Runner is a tight hour and a half, so there’s no time to get bored with it, and from a personal taste standpoint watching JT smile and bat his baby blues and Affleck give profanity laced tirades doesn’t get old.

I loved this movie, and will probably continue to love it.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going order some Thai food and watch Rounders, and maybe The Sting.


The Monuments Men again. God, I can’t wait for this movie.

Her looks unfathomably weird and after reading the Ender Quintet, I can’t help but think that Samantha, the sentient computer that Joaquin Phoenix falls in love with will wind up being as whiny, annoying and bullying as Jane.

Oldboy looks like exactly the kind of movie I don’t like. But I’m sure it’s a very good movie that I won’t like.


1. Pacific Rim

2. Runner, Runner

3. The Great Gatsby

4. The World’s End

5. Salinger

6. Kick Ass 2

7. The Butler

8. Man of Steel

9. Don Jon

10. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

11. The Wolverine

12. Iron Man 3

13. Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters

14. Despicable Me 2

15. Star Trek Into Darkness

16. Elysium

17. Monster’s University

18. After Earth

“Two Kids Flirting in a Way that only a few people in the world understand”

Sometimes I do something so unfathomably fangirly, I surprise even myself.

I mentioned that I’ve been on a Bat-binge lately. I go on them from time to time, usually spurred on by something big happening in Bat-news, or just because I decide I want to watch Batman: The Animated Series again, or because one of the 90’s Batman movies is on TV, or well, I think you get the idea.

This time it was a combination of watching Justice League and Justice League: Unlimited on Netflix, watching Beware The Batman on Cartoon Network, and Batfleck.

It’s been a doozy, and it’s been a more intense (and expensive) trip than my usuals, which usually just consist of watching Batman Begins and the episodes of B:TAS  I love again.

So, things got kicked into high gear when the boy that I loved in high school got some awesome news. A year ago he got engaged, and now he’s about to make his Broadway debut. This is amazing, and I’m actually really excited for him.

Or like 98% of me is really excited for him,

The other 2%? The totally irrational, stuck at 17 part? The part was ROYALLY pissed off.

While the 98% of my brain was saying, “hey, this is cool. He’s a talented guy. And I bet his fiance is great. And we HAVEN’T SPOKEN TO HIM IN 7 YEARS, so I bet he’s not a huge shit head anymore, and maybe even his ridiculous 2% totally regrets stomping on our heart for four years,” the ridiculous 2% was screaming back, “NO, NO, NOOOOOOOOO!!!! He stomped on our heart for four years, and now that shit head is getting married and his dream is about to come true? And what the hell are we doing, missy? We’re still single! We’re working a dumb retail job (I actually love my job), and we’re wasting time with our blog, because no one takes us seriously anyway.”

I’m not proud of this part of my brain. But I’m more than a little grateful for it. Rather than doing nothing and feeling sorry for myself and drinking a lot, (How I would have handled this feeling a year ago) when I went on my break that day, I marched up 5th Avenue to the nearest Barnes and Noble, and I decided I was going to buy some Batman comics. (This was a way of contributing to people taking my blog seriously. I don’t know. I really wasn’t thinking clearly at the time.)

I really wanted to buy The Dark Knight Returns, because even though I’ve read it before, I wanted to read it again. But alas, it was sold out. So I went with Knightfall: Volume 1. I consumed it really quickly, in about a day and a half. This isn’t spectacularly quick for reading comics, but each volume of Knightfall is about the same size as a phone book. I went on Amazon that night and ordered the other two volumes.

I loved it. I loved Bane and his bizarre and totally bonkers fixation on destroying Batman. I loved Jean-Paul Valley and his crazy mind ghosts. I loved the father/son conflict between Dick and Bruce. I loved Dick becoming Batman, even if it was just for a minute, I loved Tim Drake’s hero worship of Dick.

I found my inner fangirl again. (Aless and Ivy get credit too. So much credit.)

Anyway, after Knightfall, I was at a bit of a loss. Where to go next, you know? But Barnes and Noble called again, and I responded by picking up Batgirl/Robin: Year One.

And it was when I finished that one, that I realized it. This wasn’t a Bat-binge at all. No. Bat-binges were more simple than this. Bat-binges ended in me watching Mask of The Phantasm and crying in my bed by myself at 2 in the morning. (Oh shut up. It’s a very emotional film.) This was something different. Because when I was picking B:TAS episodes to watch, I was picking ones like, “Robin’s Reckoning,” and “Shadow of The Bat,” and “Old Wounds.” The parts of Knightfall that I was most interested in? When Dick took over from Bruce as Batman. I was watching season 2 of Young Justice again.

Gone too soon.

Gone too soon.

I was getting annoyed at Beware The Batman, not because of it’s strange animation style, but because they had the nerve to introduce Barbara Gordon but it didn’t look like Dick Grayson was going to be within ten miles of the show. (They’ve established Katanna as Batman’s sidekick, which, awesome, but then leave Babs out of it too, ya know?)

This wasn’t about Justice League, or Ben Affleck. It was barely even about Batman.

It definitely wasn’t about a boy who broke my heart almost ten years ago.

This was about shipping.

This was my inner fangirl crying out for a couple to root for, and not finding it anywhere on TV lately, and knowing how it already felt about The Mortal Instruments. (Simon/Isabelle, FTW!) And bless her twisted little heart, she wanted it to be the police commissioner’s daughter and the orphaned acrobat.

Now, obviously, shipping Barabara/Dick isn’t a new thing. I’ve always kind of loved them, even before I knew that shipping was a thing. Watching reruns of the 60’s Batman, as a small child, I’m pretty sure that I thought, “Is Batgirl Robin’s girlfriend? She should be.” If Batman And Robin hadn’t completely butchered Batigrl’s origin story, (She’s Alfred’s niece? Or something? I remember she really hated Bruce though.) I’d say that Chris O’Donnell and Alicia Silverstone’s parts were the only defensible in the movie.

Also, anytime Clooney was in straight up "Bruce Wayne" mode.

Also, anytime Clooney was in straight up “Bruce Wayne” mode.

But seriously folks, this. Like the only good thing in the movie.

But seriously folks, this. Like the only good thing in the movie.

If this were high school, I’d go on livejournal and find a “Babs+Dick4eva!” group and make icons about them. If I had the time or inclination to write fanfiction anymore, I’d write it about them.

As it is, I’m just going to read that scene in Batgirl: Year One where he gives her her first Batcycle over and over again, and sigh happily.

Or that scene in Battle for The Cowl, where even Vicky effing Vale, (The investigative reporter who was boning Bruce Wayne for a while and still couldn’t figure out he was Batman.) realizes that they’re in love with each other.

Or the part of Batman and Robin: Batman Vs. Robin where Dick as Batman tells Kathy Kane (Batwoman) that he has a thing for redheaded crime fighters while trying to awkwardly flirt with her. (It’s not just Barbara, it’s also Starfire, but that’s not bring her into this conversation.)

Or the entire middle sections of Batgirl: The Darkest Mirror where they beat the crap out of each other, and call it “playing tag.”

Pictured: Vigilante Foreplay

Pictured: Vigilante Foreplay

Or the scene in Nightwing: Traps and Trapezes where Barbara walks in on Dick and his childhood circus friend (who he’s been boinking) and makes sarcastic comments at him. (I just finished this book, and I loved that part so much, I went back and reread it immediately.)

I think you get the point.

So I would like to welcome Dick Grayson and Barbara Gordon to the my shipping party. Go to the bar and chat with Julie The Cat Gaffney and Dean Portman, they’ve been here a while and can show you around, be careful though because Serena Vanderwoodsen and Nate Archibald are having sex on that bar. Lucas Scott and Brooke Davis will probably want to take a break from Seth Cohen and Summer Roberts constant bickering, so they’ll be around too. Looking for someone to brood with? You’ve got Jess Mariano and Rory Gilmore to talk with, although Jacob Black and Leah Clearwater are also great for that. Or maybe you feel like avoiding your feelings and obvious attraction for a while? Emma Swann and Captain Hook are around somewhere, and that’s what they’re doing. And hey! If you miss your friends and family, there’s good news! Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle are on the roof, fighting and probably making out, and Oliver Queen and Dinah Lance are in the corner making fun of everyone.

Enjoy yourselves, I certainly will.