Game Of Thrones Winner: “The Last Of The Starks”

No one wins.

NO WINNER.

Screw you.

You don’t kill my girl and get a winner.

But if I had to pick it would be Brienne.

Or Gendry.

They both got everything they wanted for a hot second, and then not so much.

But seriously. Fuck you.

Instead of a winner, it’s just RIP Missandei.

May your badass bestie and boyfriend avenge you.

MIssandei

Rest In Power

Arya And Gendry Watch

Gendry is the Lord of Storm’s End. He asked Arya to marry him which is adorable. She said no, because of course she did. Then she rode off with the Hound. They’re off to King’s Landing. I assume so he can kill his brother and she can kill Cersei.

Sansa’s Agency Watch

Sansa’s running The North, and she’s taking no shit from anyone. She squares things with The Hound, and with Jon, and in the end even tells Jon’s secret to Tyrion, because I don’t know, whatever. She doesn’t care. She’s gonna get hers. She’s earned it.

Arya Badass Watch

Headin’ to King’s Landing to go Cersei Hunting. I am on board. Cersei can suck all the dicks and die in a fire.

#NotAStark #NotABastard

Cat’s out of the bag, on this one. Dany asked Jon to tell NO ONE AT ALL. He said, “I have to tell my sister/cousins!” She’s like, “Sansa will use that to keep me from being queen you beautiful idiot!” And Jon just tells anyway, because, *sigh.* Anyway, he’s riding to King’s Landing, and also Rhaegal is dead (for real this time.)

Brienne Gets Some

Not going to recur, but Brienne got some! WITH JAIME. Way to get some Brienne! Also, good for Jaime, this was the first non twincest sex he ever had. Then he had to go and blow his chance at happiness, because you know prophecy and destiny.

I Am Team Varys, and Why Aren’t You?

Varys, as always, is backing many horses. He appears to be #TeamJon at the moment. But you never really know with him. But he tends to be right, so I’ll just back his play.

We have two weeks left.

I’m not OK.

BUt You know, whatever. Here we are.

I’m pretty angry about this one, y’all.

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